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Second-hand TV
We all know that we need to limit our children’s exposure to second-hand smoke. We also know that we are told to limit the amount of TV that they watch. But how many of you know that we are now being told to limit the amount of “second hand TV” they watch?
How often is the TV on in your home, just as background noise? Even if our kids aren’t sitting in front of the TV and watching it, simply having it on can be harmful. A recent article on NPR.org says:
“Researchers who conducted a national survey of kids’ exposure to TVs droning on in the background say, ‘The amount of exposure for the average child is startling.’ How much is it, exactly? Try just under four hours a day for the typical kid.”
But, you may be asking, What’s the harm in having the TV on if the child isn’t sitting and watching? There are several reasons.
“Well, the researchers write, background TV may lower the quality of interactions between parents and kids, lower kids’ performance on tasks that require real thinking and drain kids’ attention during playtime.”
Follow the link above to read the full article. But if you do nothing else, make a concerted effort to turn the TV off, especially if nobody is watching. One compromise I’ve made with my husband during football season is that he’ll put the TV on mute. If the kids are playing in a nearby room, a TV on mute won’t affect them.
I’ve made a commitment to keeping a close eye on the amount of TV my kids watch. And now, I will start paying attention to their exposure to “second-hand TV.”
Make play a priority
Life and a sick child have gotten the better of me, so I only have the energy to leave you with this one thought. It’s an important one, though, so pay attention. As you think about what activities to sign your kids up for this fall, and as you look ahead to school starting (if it hasn’t started already), think about play. Yes, homework needs to be done, and music classes can be very enriching. But please stop yourself before you sign up for much more than that. Take a look at this amazing graphic.
I agree with every single word. Let your kids be kids. Let them play outside and inside every day. Make play a priority!
Homeschooled vs. homeschoolers
I came across this amazing YouTube video about homeschooling. This brilliantly witty woman makes the distinction between those who are homeschooled and those who are homeschoolers. It’s worth a few good laughs, but she also makes a good point. Take a look!
Don’t rush your child to grow up
On Wednesday, I talked about a NY Times article that discusses the idea of “overparenting.” The article talks about parents doing too much for their kids. Rushing our children like this, the authors say, has harmful effects on the child’s developing sense of self.
I flipped open my Growing Kids God’s Way book tonight and discovered a passage that discusses this idea directly. (I love it when I flip open a book and it gives me exactly the message I need at that moment.)
“All too often, parents rush the process of growing up. Too soon, Dad and Grandpa are signing R.J. up for junior hockey, simply because he was mesmerized by the latest ESPN commercial. … Never mind the fact that R.J. is only four years old and hates the cold. Dad is left coercing, correcting, pleading, and dealing with tears, while R.J. is clearly out of his league,” (Growing Kids God’s Way, p. 178).
It is fantastic when children develop a true passion for a sport or any other extracurricular activity, but when the primary motivation comes from the outside, the child’s sense of self is hindered. The book goes on:
“Maybe you have not rushed your child to the hockey rink lately, but have you rushed him in other behavior activities that are way beyond his intellectual and social readiness or interest? … Think about their readiness to learn. While it is true that the brain grows best when challenged, it is also true that such challenges must be developmentally and age appropriate. Too often, parents push their children into higher learning activities only to discover that their children’s abilities are impaired because they were rushed. … Children in our society are rushed morally, behaviorally, sexually, intellectually, and physically,” (Growing Kids God’s Way, p. 178).
It’s a curious thing, this need of parents to rush their children. We always want the best for them, and we get caught up in this trap that our child has to be better and smarter than every other child. What are some ways to speed the process along? Teach them to read at a year old! Sign them up for competitive chess at age 2! Fill their summers with camps that promise unparalleled enrichment!
Can you detect my sarcasm? Let your child be a child. I remember when my oldest was little. It was easy to get caught up in this competition. He knew all of his letters before he was 2 and he was reading at age 4. But I have since learned that there’s really no point in it at all. Who’s to say that a child who learns his letters at age 2 is going to be smarter than the child who learns them at age 3 or 4? The only thing it tells you for sure is that the parents are motivated to push the child. It really doesn’t say much about the child.
And back when William was little, I heard other parents (parents of children older than mine) say, “What’s the rush?” In my ignorance (or arrogance), I thought, Well, they just don’t understand or care that their child be the best he can be. I have learned so much in my (almost) 8 years as a parent! I’m now the one saying, “What’s the rush?” It’s true, what meaningful advantage will your child have by learning everything a little bit sooner? And do you want to run the risk of burnout by age 6?
Perhaps more to the point, what will your child miss out on by learning academics or being pushed into sports before he is developmentally ready? Most kids are developmentally ready for academics around the age of 5. (There’s a reason schools don’t take them before they’re 5.) When they are 2, they are still figuring out the world. When they are 3, they are learning to play imaginatively (and think critically). Let him develop naturally, and you’ll be sure he doesn’t skip over any critical developmental phases.
In fact, academics will come more easily and naturally when the child is ready. Start early and you’re in for months or years of heartache. Equate it to potty training. If you start before they’re ready, you’ll deal with months and months of accidents and a discouraged mom and child. If you wait until the child shows signs of readiness, you can potty train him in a week. I did!
Okay, I’ll get off my soapbox now. But before I do, I have one request. When you think about starting a new activity (physical, academic, whatever), give some thought as to whether he’s really ready and what might be the harm in waiting a little while longer. Before long, I bet you’ll be the one saying, “What’s the rush?!”
Sustained silent reading
By Valerie Plowman, Chronicles of a Babywise Mom
I am a huge proponent of reading. One of my main goals as a parent has always been to teach my children to not only be capable of reading, but love reading. I come from a line of readers, and I believe the person who can and does read opens a whole world of possibilities to himself.
When I came across the idea of Sustained Silent Reading (SSR) in The Read Aloud Handbook by Jim Trelease, I was very excited. It has come to be my number one favorite piece of advice from the book. It is something I do with my children consistently and have seen many great benefits from it.
WHAT IS SSR?
SSR is essentially reading for pleasure each day. When it comes time for SSR, you choose your reading material–whether it be magazines, a book, the newspaper…whatever it is you feel like reading, you read. You read together so that the children can see you modeling reading, but everyone is silent.
WHY DO SSR?
- SSR provides the opportunity to read for a long enough length of time that reading becomes natural. SSR has been shown to improve reading skills.
- SSR gives children the opportunity to read for fun. It shows kids that reading can be for pleasure. There are no quizzes and no tests–no pressure. SSR has been shown to improve attitude toward reading.
HOW DO YOU IMPLEMENT SSR?
Here are some tips on implementing SSR in the home:
- You can do SSR with a non-reader.
- Start with a shorter length of time. 10-15 minutes is a good start. You can then move up from there according to age and ability of child. We do 20-30 minutes a day; however, my seven year old often continues his SSR for another 20-30 minutes.
- Allow the child to choose his/her own reading material. Remind the child to gather enough reading material to fill the time. For a child who cannot read independently, she will likely need several picture books (or whatever she chooses) to get through the 10-15 (or more) minutes.
- Have a variety of reading material available in the home. Research shows that “the more kinds of reading material in a home the higher the child’s reading scores in school” (page 90), so don’t feel like if your child chooses to read the paper it is worthless time spent reading.
- Have SSR at a time of day you can be most consistent with. For my older children (7 and 5), I like to have it after lunch. This is a time of day that is great to relax and take a break.
- You read, also. You will come to love this time as much as your children do!
- No getting up and changing material once SSR has started. Part of your goal is to have sustained focus on reading, and if the child is getting up and down over and over to change books, it will distract from that goal. That is why you remind them to get enough to last through the time. If they misjudge (and they will at first), tell them to look through their books again.
- No talking during SSR.
- No reports after SSR is over. This is just for fun. That doesn’t mean you can’t talk about what you read, just no formal testing.
ANECDOTAL EXPERIENCE
Like I said, we love our SSR. We have now been doing it for about a year and a half.
I love it for me. I love reading, and this is a chance for me to get some uninterrupted reading time each day–something that can be very hard to come by as a mom!
I love it for my children. I see that they love it–they never grumble or complain when it is SSR time. It also gives them a physical break in the middle of the day and allows them to just relax and escape into the world of whatever they are reading.
I have also seen reading skills improve greatly, especially in my full-on reader. My recently-turned-seven year old has gotten faster and faster at reading during the last two months. He has gone from finishing a chapter book in a day or two to finishing it in just over an hour (we have added some more difficult books for him because of his speed). When SSR is over, he always wants to read longer.
I see the efforts of SSR paying off in our home. Give it a try! You will see great benefits, also.
Valerie is a mother to four, including a newborn, and blogs at www.babywisemom.com.
See my rain gutter bookshelves!
In the past, I’ve talked about creating reading nooks throughout the house to encourage our kids to read. If we surround our children with books and create cozy spots for reading, they’ll be more likely to read. Simple as that!
One fantastic way to encourage reading is to ensure our children can see the covers of their books, not just their spines. Rain gutter bookshelves are the perfect solution! I wish I could claim the idea as my own, but nonetheless, I have them in my house! My husband and I took a trip to Home Depot, and $50 and 2 hours later, we had rain gutter bookshelves.
Here’s how it looks:
The rain gutters are on the far wall. They do rise above my kids’ heads, but it hasn’t been a problem so far. They can either stand on a kid-sized chair or ask a parent to get any book that’s out of reach. Notice that I still have a regular bookshelf there. The rain gutter shelves only hold so many books, so I will regularly rotate out the books that sit on the rain gutters. Any library books will also go on the rain gutters.
These shelves achieved exactly the effect I was looking for. My kids were so excited to see their books! They spend much more time reading than they used to. It even worked with a 7-year-old friend who came over. Despite all the toys she knew were there, she chose to read.
If you’re looking to do this in your home, you might consider making 2 or 3 longer shelves instead of 4 short ones. The wall we put them on extends out only a few inches from what you see here, so we were limited. This would save you some money. Oddly enough, the actual 10-foot gutter was only $5. But at $7-10 each, the end caps and support hooks added up. So if we did two fewer shelves, we would have used fewer end caps and fewer hooks.
And just for fun, I’ll show you the rest of our playroom makeover. Our playroom is actually the formal living room in our house; it got very little use before the kids were born. Over the years, the kids have collected so many toys, and while the bins and bookshelves were great for a while, they just got too overwhelming. I even created little labels with the name of the bin and a picture of the bin category, so anybody who can’t read the label can see the picture. But the toys and books just started overflowing, and I was the only one who put the toys in their appropriate bins.
My solution? Repurpose the armoire that used to hold our old TV (before we got a flat screen). Thanks, Mom, for convincing me not to get rid of it! It’s amazing how many toys fit in that thing! Almost every single toy you see in the “before” picture is in the armoire. The mini-trampoline got relegated to the garage, as did the Lincoln Logs that collected dust. But everything else is there!
As embarrassed as I am, here’s the before picture (in all its messy glory):
And here’s the after!
There’s still a box of trucks on the floor that I need to get another bin for. It turns out that Bed Bath & Beyond no longer sells the bins I use, so I have to decide if I’m okay getting a bin that looks slightly different than all the others. I suppose that now that they’re all in the armoire, it doesn’t matter much.
Let them interrupt while you read
In general, we try to discourage our children from interrupting. Whether we’re talking to another adult or busily tending to another child, we encourage children to wait. The interrupt rule is a great tool to teach our children to interrupt politely.
But there is one case in which I say interruption is warranted, or even welcomed. That is when we are reading. Too often, we shush our children during a story so the story can be more fluid and so we can just get on with it. But I have learned that it’s beneficial to allow a child to interrupt my reading.
When I allow William to interrupt while I read, he asks all sorts of questions that help him fill in the blanks. It enables him to better comprehend the story. Just tonight, as I was reading Alice in Wonderland (and reading it slowly), he asked several questions:
- Can the Queen be a mom?
- What is a Duchess?
- What does execution mean? (The Queen always shouts “off with her head!”)
- What is a Griffin?
- What does mock mean?
I love that he reads over my shoulder as I read because he can see the words that he doesn’t know the meaning of. He can see that it clearly says “mock” and he doesn’t know what it means. It’s not a matter of him misunderstanding the word or hearing me wrong as I read. The next time he encounters the word, he’ll know what it means, and he’ll also know how to read/pronounce it correctly. (By the way, the Kindle is great for this because if I don’t know what a word means or I can’t find the right words to describe it, I can call up the Kindle’s dictionary, and it gives us a definition right then and there.)
As we were reading tonight, and as he was interrupting, he realized something funny (which I think is so cute). The Mock Turtle was telling his “history” to Alice and the Griffin, and he warned them not to say a word until he was done with his story. Well, Alice didn’t heed that and asked the Mock Turtle all sorts of questions. William thought it was funny that he was interrupting me just like Alice was interrupting the Mock Turtle. Cute.
So whenever you read, allow your child to ask questions to ensure he comprehends the story. And if he doesn’t ask questions, you might even say, “Do you know what a Queen is?” It’s important to know if they are truly listening and attending to the story.
Also make note of where your child is in the process of learning to read. If, like William, your child knows how to read, you might point out long, difficult words to show him what the word looks like as you pronounce it. If, as with Lucas, your child is just beginning to put sounds together, you might point to the letters as you sound them out slowly. I also take the time to point out some sight words. We’ve been learning “is” and “the” recently. But of course, don’t make learning to read the focus of your story time. Allow your child to enjoy the story.
Savor books by reading slowly
Do you read to your kids every night as part of your bedtime routine? I just figured out a trick that will help you and your child not only enjoy your reading time, but also learn something from the books you are reading.
I discovered this trick quite by accident. I recently finished reading Nim’s Island to William, my 7-year-old, and I was shocked by how little of it he actually comprehended. This is my smart boy, but at the end of the book, he was asking basic questions about the main characters in the book.
He has always read more fluently than he comprehends. He can sound out any word you put in front of him, but getting him to understand a long, complicated story is a different endeavor.
I realized two reasons behind his lack of comprehension during bedtime reading. 1) It’s always late and he’s tired. There’s nothing much we can do about this other than supplement our reading time during the day. I still think bedtime reading is important. 2) I always read too fast! I read at a pace that’s more suitable for myself than a 7-year-old, and since I’m at the end of a long day, too, I want to read and be done.
What an epiphany! Just by reading more slowly, he’ll get more out of our reading time.
When we finished Nim’s Island and were ready to start a new book, I pulled out my Kindle and let him choose from 3 books I already had loaded. They were Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, The Adventures of Tom Sawyer, and Alice in Wonderland. He immediately chose the latter (partly because he has a cousin named Alice). Well, since it’s an older book, I didn’t expect it to go very well. But with my new idea to read slowly, we were going to give it a try.
He is really enjoying the book! And not only is he enjoying it, he’s learning some fantastic vocabulary words. Just in chapter 3, which we read last night, we came across these words: consultation, familiarly, anxiously, usurpation, conquest, accustomed, melancholy, advisable, insolence, adjourn, offended, and despair. Even Shakespeare is mentioned. All this from a children’s book!
The more slowly I read, the more likely it is that he will pick up on these words (either by asking their meaning or taking them in context). Plus, William has always been able to spell at the same level he can read. So not only is he being exposed to this rich vocabulary and learning the meaning of new words, but he is likely learning to spell them. (It helps that he reads over my shoulder as I read.)
In The Read-Aloud Handbook Trelease talks about the importance of reading slowly:
“The most common mistake in reading aloud—whether the reader is a seven-year-old or a forty-year-old—is reading too fast. Read slowly enough for the child to build mental pictures of what he just heard you read. Slow down enough for the children to see the pictures in the book without feeling hurried,” (p. 76-77).
One of my favorite homeschool bloggers has discussed the idea of savoring books. She says:
“Instead of reading a book or two a week and then going on to the next one, my children started several books at the same time but read them slowly over a 10-week period or longer.
I began to notice that my children were talking at the supper table about the characters and episodes in the books they were reading. They were acting out those stories with each other and including them in their playtimes. They even began to write their own stories, without my prompting, by copying the main idea and style of the book they were reading. Wow! My children were enjoying their books much more since they had time to ruminate and live with the characters and ideas expressed within the pages. Not only that, they remembered, and still remember years later, little details about those beloved stories. I realized that deep and lasting learning was taking place in a delightful, non-hurried manner.”
I love this! I’ve also read that we should leave our kids wanting more. Read a chapter and be done. Let them sit with it for a day before moving on. And rather than reading many books quickly and considering it a source of pride, we will now be reading slowly and savoring, enjoying, and learning from every page we read.
______________________
If you haven’t read my post on raising a voracious reader, go check it out. It’s full of tips on how to improve reading time with our children.
Create a reading haven
Last week, I offered tips on how to raise a voracious reader. One of my tips was to surround yourselves with books and to create several reading spots in the home. To start, keep a basket of books by the child’s bed, in the bathroom and in the car. Keep a bag of books (or a Kindle) by the door to grab on your way to the park or beach this summer. Make note of the books that your child likes to read many times over and keep those in the same basket or bag. But beyond those select few, swap books out regularly for variety.
And when you think about creating a reading haven in your home, think about more than just books. Create a nook (or two) where your child will want to retreat to for some reading time. Create a cozy space with a comfortable chair and good lighting (table lamps, not harsh overhead lights). Thanks to the amazing Pinterest, I’ll share a few fantastic reading havens other people have created in their own homes. Click on the images to see more ideas.
Reading Tents
Don’t these look so cozy?
I want this one!
Bookshelves
Kids will be much more inclined to read books when they can see them. Create bookshelves that display the cover of books, not just their spines.
Creative Spaces
Do you live in a small home or apartment? Get creative with your space. Turn a closet into a reading nook, hang some bookshelves on a door, or as with the tent above, create a collapsible nook that you can put up and tear down as needed.
Yes, this (below) is a closet!
These shelves (below) were created with Ikea spice racks, so you can imagine how narrow they are. They’re just wide enough to hold spice jars, or a few books!
Lighting
Get creative with the lighting in your reading nooks.
Click on the image below for instructions on how to create this Pottery Barn-inspired paper lantern.
A chandelier? Why not?
Outdoor Reading Nooks
Don’t forget outside! Whether you throw a blanket on the grass or create a separate reading nook, some of the best reading is done outdoors.
Want something simple? Throw a sheet over a rope for an outdoor reading tent like this one:
And if this (below) doesn’t provide inspiration, I don’t know what will? Isn’t this amazing?!
Do you have a reading haven in your home? If so, share pictures!
Raise a voracious reader
Are you a reader? Do you understand the importance of reading for children? Do you read to your child?
Reading to our children is Parenting 101, but sadly, many parents don’t do it, particularly after the child has learned to read himself. Reading to our children and encouraging them to read has so many benefits. They include:
• Developing the imagination. (Reading requires kids to imagine the stories in their mind’s eye. TV creates the images for them.)
• Setting a foundation for phonics and pre-reading.
• Learning life-long spelling and grammar skills. (The non-readers I know couldn’t spell if their lives depended on it!)
• Broadening the vocabulary, exposing the reader to words he might not otherwise encounter.
• Encouraging grammatically correct speech. (Read quality literature and you’ll never read sentences like “Him and I are going to the store.” or “Where are you at?”)
• Developing a life-long love for reading.
These benefits just scratch the surface. But based on these alone, we should be encouraged to raise voracious readers. So how do you raise a voracious reader? Here are some tips:
• Start reading from day one. I started reading to my kids when they were 4 months old. It’s never too early to start.
• Schedule reading times. At a minimum, read before bed. Also read during lunch and before nap. For older children who may be reluctant readers, make daily reading a requirement.
• Have a “sustained silent reading” time every day. This is time where you all just sit around reading books on your own. You read your book and your children read theirs.
• Allow even the littlest ones to hold books. But teach children to respect books by carefully turning pages (not tearing them) and putting them away carefully (not throwing them!).
• Go to the library, often. Go to story times, join the library’s summer reading program, and let your child choose as many books as he wants.
• Surround yourselves in books. Keep reading spots in several areas of the home (bathroom, by the child’s bed, in the play room, etc.).
• Encourage friends and family to gift books for birthdays and Christmas. Teach children that books are a treasured gift.
• Be a reading role model. Let your children see you reading books. This is something I need to work on because I do most of my reading when they are asleep. This is where sustained silent reading helps.
• Put the electronics away. Limit your and your child’s screen time.
• Don’t rely on schools to create a voracious reader. Reading happens first and foremost in the home.
• Get squirrelly boys to sit and read. Allow them to read graphic novels, comic books, joke books, and general information non-fiction books. Do you see your boy picking up rocks outside to find bugs?Get an “All About Bugs” book from the library.
• Use programs like BookAdventure.com and the library’s summer reading program to give children incentives to read.
• Use sites like GoodReads.com and ReadKiddoRead.com to find good books. GoodReads.com is my favorite new site. You can rate books you’ve read, and it will give you suggestions for books just like it. There are also lists created by others. I searched for children’s books that are in a series. There are several Indian in the Cupboard books. You can also search for Newbery and Caldecott award winners. (Look at all of these lists!) GoodReads.com is also social, so you can see what your friends are reading and what they recommend.
• Read to your child long after he has learned to read on his own. Reading aloud enables you to read books that are beyond the child’s reading level. The vocabulary, plot lines, and character development are much richer. Also reading aloud enables you to vary your tone for punctuation (quotes, exclamation marks, etc.) which makes for a more interesting story.
• Allow your child to read over your shoulder. William follows along as I read to him and will sometimes correct me if I read a word too fast! The other day, he commented on the word “ajar” wondering why it was squished together like that (assuming it should have been “a jar”). This only happened because he saw the word, and it gave me a great opportunity to introduce a new vocabulary word! With pre-readers and emerging readers, you might point to words (particularly sight words) as you read them.
• Encourage quality, not quantity. Rich books like the Indian in the Cupboard and The Cricket in Times Square (William’s favorites!) are better than “twaddle” like Diary of a Wimpy Kid. (Don’t get me started on Captain Underpants. It has intentionally misspelled words! Luckily, William was smart enough to notice.)
• Savor books. Don’t zip through them, thinking more is more. Savor them and immerse yourselves in the characters’ lives. Even if your child wants to read more and more, just stop. Leave him hungry for more, and he’ll think and talk about the book and will ask for more reading times.
• Allow a child to read from a black-and-white e-reader like the Kindle if the device will create reading excitement. While iPads, the Kindle Fire, and other tablets can be good for reading, I suggest you avoid them. The temptation to play games can be too great, and would require quite a bit of oversight.
• Supplement reading with books on CD. These are perfect for room time. But be sure to use these as a supplement, not a replacement for reading.
If you like these tips and want to know more about the importance of reading, pick up a copy of The Read-Aloud Handbook by Jim Trelease. Not only does it offer statistics about reading, but also it offers great suggestions for books. Nearly half the book is devoted to book suggestions.
Happy reading!